Living in a patriarchal society is the fact that I pride and regret. Being protected and cannot grow independently. However I want to be independent for some reason

 

Boy is always counted as the better one. Boy is born as a person in charge to every girl in this world. Even it’s in Indonesia or wherever, you will find the fact. Girl is always protected due to her weakness. Girl may not go out of home as they like. Rule, Regulation, girl has them more than boy, needless to mention one by one, you will sure about it.

I guess the case that I want to tell you will restrict only to my environment because I live in religious environment and come from venerated scholar family. Girl and boy are differentiated. It’s taboo to meet a boy in our eyes. We have single sex school and surely live in the boarding school which we never meet a boy at once. There will be no interaction between girl and boy, for social orientation until talk about study etc. And finally girl is only a tribute for boy in the end of the day (married). After that, girl will always still face its restricted environment.

They may not go to work. Girl is only permitted to make her face up to present good looking to her husband, birth the baby which it means girl satisfy the biological need of the boy, and cooking every day and organize house stuff. Hmm those activity in Javanese derives the term 3M for a female: Macak (make up), Manak (have birth a child), and Masak (cooking).

Someone will feel that it’s only happened in R.A Kartini era. Yes they’re right, the different thing is located in our education which has been existing in recent situation even interaction is still limited because that single sex school. However I pride to make my gender in my environment has achieved their need of education. 

Even I am one of the society that live in that village with super patriarchal system, I don’t take any part of them because my family make me spend my childhood in capital city of Indonesia which the boundaries has disappear in capital city social intercourse. However I still face the fact which I have great control that’s made by my parents until I go to university. I may not ride motorcycle by myself. I may not go anywhere out of maghrib with my friend. I may not have a friend much with a boy instead bringing the boy come to my house. I praise some boundaries tried to turn down in my life, every restriction to do interaction with a boy is about boundaries around religion which extremely need to be obeyed. However I am still protected for insecurity even though I want to be dependent. Yes I have won in some case toward girl in my environment to get interaction and education as high as I can. But I still have problem and it’s important to be counted. Hmm some of husband will forbide his wife to work. 

Now I don’t talk in my limited environment but it’s about whole world which make husband will have strictly rule in permitting the wife go to work. A man in this life, not to mention, in some region or racial will have a paradigm to make the wife not going to work. It’s caused of some feeling of man that man has capacity to fulfill the financial need of his wife and children so wife may not go to work to find money. Some husband is offended if his wife searches money by herself. And  part of husband will afraid if his wife can generate money more than him. Those are some why reason wife must be housewife.

Here, I surely want to oppose the idea of husband that forbids his wife being a carrier woman for all the reason. I want to emphasize that going to work for me is not about searching money as much as possible. I don’t have any intention to compete with my husband in the future about how much money that I could generate by my hand. It also doesn’t  mean that I want to oppress my husband because I can save money more than him. No! Not for those stereotype!

I am here going to get higher education means that I want to search knowledge as much as possible because my religion suggests every people to get knowledge, limitless for girl and boy (as my quote in the right of this blog). Not stop until that point, I also want to give beneficial for all people in my surrounding. I want to make my knowledge which I have dug for many years and put effort to delight my parents by lot of achievement will bring me to people that able to spread beneficial by it. So how if I’ll be housewife later and not develop my knowledge in the real world as my dream since I was child?

The idea to limit the movement of woman to be a carrier woman is a big wound for me. I have not married yet for now but I worry if some man did the case to me later. I heard the case recently and see the fact which occurs to some woman in my surrounding. I don’t want it happen to me, really.

It’s like a hell to study more in my program until get title as a bachelor and also put big effort to catch a lot of trophy since in my high school but finally I must stay in my house and forget every knowledge that I pursue. It’s also be a bargaining power for me if I have a job and able to search money by my own way. It means that I don’t need to ask money to my husband for giving money to my parent in making them happy and life in welfare.The most important is that I have a power to finance my life and children when he will leave me out when he die (jangan tinggalin saya dulu bang tapi) because I have habituation to generate money for my life. Yes however I need money to give me a bargaining power when he dishonest to me (please yang ini naudzubillah tertimpa sama aku, jangan gituin saya ya bang , love you :(((( )

Yes I want to get my right better than before. I am grateful to have a right getting education as high as possible and go out from my village and able to have a partner with boy. However I still want to take more right by opposing some idea which I think not relevant to be implemented in this life for now. Maybe you will call me as a part of feminist that sue a lot of right woman whom we think we are discriminated. But hey, I only want this additional right for being functional woman in his world. 

I don’t force to make everyone legalize woman topless in media. I don’t force world to make  me can abort baby in my womb and also smoke when I get pregnancy under a reason of body autonomy right. I also don’t have desire to make man live in house while I pursue my carrier.  I don’t even want to degrade man dignity for importance of my gender. I am not radical feminist. Seriously.

I cannot deny taking after my children by myself is important. Because children need to get high treatment by giving them love and teach them with every value which prevails in this world. It also seems better to serve our dinner by my hand. My heart wants to do that but my brain flies me to an idea being a carrier woman indeed.

I want to achieve my dream to be a lecturer. I want it. Please hear me my future husband and also every boy who marry with educated woman. I believe that I myself can organize my time between my carrier and about house stuff. I will go to work meanwhile my children go to school or will be taken after by baby sitter on half day because I need to go to campus for teaching. I will still cook for my husband. But let me allow not to clean my house and give it to a servant, my dearest.

I surely believe it will run well between my carrier and house stuff. I will not get job in office which force me going to work from 8 a.m to 8 p.m every day. No I don’t. Ah I wish to meet you, my husband who understand my want. Believe me, I will make you and our children happy.

Only strive my right, not to wrest my tribute to you and all man in this world.

Little feminist,

Sintia

Marhaban Yaa Ramadhan!

Bright month, Holy month, and Glorious month approach every Moslem in the world by the date of June 18^th, 2015

Ramadhan is the month which every rahmah falls every time to the world. Everyone always miss all day along ramadhan that always be heard by reciting of Al-Qur’an fluently in the evening. Everyone will do shalat tarawih that’s specially exist in this month. Everyone will miss every days that’s very worth to pray because we will get double score in the view of Allah. Only in Ramadhan also, adzan Maghrib is the special voice that brings us to heaven in a day (ngalay, itu mah sih gue doang).

Yeayy everyone will wait Ramadhan to come along day that we have.

For your information, it’s the first time I am far from my family in the 1^st day of Ramadhan alone however I will go back to my house and do fasting in my house soon. In this 1^st day, I would write something that I will do during Ramadhan: 

Ramadhan Lovers,

Sintia^^

June 4^th, 2015

Happy 18^th Birthday, Sintia!!

I opened the calendar and just perceive that June 4^th will come on following 5 days. I gaze on the date and I think, Sintia’s day will not be remembered by people in my surroundings, and it’s true.

My birthday come on Thursday, I could not celebrate my birthday in house with family because I still have class by the time. I woke up and found some new messages that told happy birthday to me with all pray. Yes, they are my parents and my brother.

I perceive no one will say birthday to me today because I am freshman that never tell about my birthday even I found my best friend told it in the morning.

All runs usually on the day even I got birthday sayings by everyone in my organization that’s told by Line. On the day, I also got surprise from my friend in Research and Development department of Himpunan Mahasiswa Jurusan Akuntansi when I do evaluation in some program. They made me cry by all attempt, they succeed and sent me a simple cake and force me to blow the candle above it.

Nothing special in the day even some people has attempt to make me happy so I am better off  because my special someone was late to say birthday to me. Before he comes, I catch some idea that appears on the day:

Birthday is not special day actually, it’s only memorize the day when my mother has struggled to birth me in this world. Mama said that it was very hard to birth baby Sintia under a lot of medical problem however mama able to birth me normally. Sometimes, it will be wound for mama to remember the misery day in her life even I’m her second child. It clearly shows that my birthday is not the day which need to be remembered especially for mama.

Hmm… By this case that I hope much but I got nothing, I just perceive my age will grow up but nothing get to remember, people in my surroundings on June 4^th, 2015 taught me the idea!

Sintia doesn’t need to celebrate her birthday, useless!

Those questions will be asked to Indonesian student since they are in elementary school to senior high school in History subject. Moreover in the university level, it also impose student to answer those questions when they talk about Pendidikan Kewarganegaraan subject especially in chapter Wawasan Nusantara which student need to know history of the country to develop student’s insight in making policy if they are selected to be part of government.

Things that I’m very wonder is about developing of post road along north Java which has 1100 km. I don’t’ understand how Netherland has idea to make it. I am grateful that Netherland has starting idea about make the post road even though the implementation was done by Indonesian with highly painful. However big post road that Indonesian nowadays call it Jalur Pantura (Pantai Utara) or mean post road that across on the north java from the east to the west one is the prove of colonialism that has a lot of function for Indonesian which we can enjoy the benefit until now.

Jalur Pantura can be called as the crowded road in Java, it can be a connection from Jakarta as the central city to all city in Java Island which is Indonesian main island. Jalur Pantura is always loaded by truck that brings goods and distribute to all Java place and the transportation when people do urbanization from their village to Jakarta. Needless to say it will be the reason that ‘Id Mubarak will always make Jalur Pantura is loaded by transportation.

I want to emphasize you that Jalur Pantura is functioned for a lot of people in Indonesia especially for Java as main island of Indonesia. It will ease the distribution of goods around Java and mobility of people, as I’ve told you before.

Oh I talked too much. However I want to tell you that on April 29^th, 2015 would be the time which I can pass all the noble jalur pantura with its excited history. I ever went to the end of west jalur Pantura that is Anyer when I was in elementary school joining my father’s vacation in his office. I also often went home to Malang from Jakarta across all way of Jalur Pantura from Jakarta to Pasuruan. And last day, I went to the end of east Jalur Pantura when I had an opportunity to delegates on Student Conference which place in Denpasar.

Oh it will be great appreciation for my life to have ever spent every miles of the post road that spanned from Anyer to Panarukan.

Oh Jalur Pantura, I’m so grateful to have you. Thank you great past Indonesian who has heart to be tortured by colonialism! You are not useless, everyone grate you!

Traveller,

S.

After I decided stop debating in some months ago, I am used to believing that I will go to another world, writing!

“Writing is The activity or occupation of composing text for publication

That’s what Oxford Dictionary says. To me, writing is ‘complex thing’.

A lot of people say that speaking is hard to be learned, everyone always feel that speaking in front of many people is very difficult. They afraid and don’t have courage to stand up in front of audience moreover start to speak up.

They are them, not me. I don’t know whether it’s anugerah or whatever, I love to speak in front of people. Since I was child, I was the first person who put my hand up in order to answer the question of teachers. I would answer the question and told a story without any nervous or embarrassment. I also ever be a master of ceremony in big event when I was in 2^nd elementary school and it would’ve continued until  now.

Yes, I do love speaking. My starting point for using my preference in speaking is joining debate class. I used to make my speech was in structure and systematically speaking. I made it by reading a lot of newspaper, non-fiction book, research a million matter, etc. I do love this action and have joined some competitions.

Not to mention I left debate, but this is my time to change my way.

To be Writer…

Writing is more difficult than I thought in advance. To be speaker is easier than we need to make something that’s written systematically. Maybe everyone will think when we have been able to speak so it will be easy for us to write. But writing is different, especially to be great writer. Make it systematic writing is different with speak systematically like debating.

Debate is an activity when someone argue their opinion in different idea and there will be an opposition side that will oppose the idea of someone. The goal of debate is making every people agree about or opinion so we have to ensure them by arguing systematic and logically.

That is my definition even Oxford says that:

Whatever the definition, I am sure that I’m a part of people that love this activity. Debate that I mean here is Parliamentary Debate that is for competition where we argue all of our argument in English and there’s role of doing the debate.

Parliamentary debate generally consists by  2 kind of debate (1) Asian/Australian Debate;  consists 3 people in each team who debate with another team as opposition side. This type also divide to Asian Parliamentary Debate that permit point of interruption and  Australian Parliamentary Debate which is not (2) British Parliamentary Debate; consists 2 people in each team with 2 team under pros side who battle with 2 team as opposition side.

I studied debate since I was 2^nd grade of Senior High School in English Club. I meet with great coach, named Mr. Edy Darmawan. He can make me  and my friend debate professionally even by the time I and all my friend could not speak English well. You can imagine that it’s hard to study Parliamentary Debate with low capability in speaking English or even did debate systematically as Great Debater

It’s about the silly thing that I write in column “Random Fact” above this text, point 28 exactly. I write that Sintia doesn’t like animal but never desire to kill them.

Animal is one of creator that’s created by God, beside plant and human, they are same in front of God,  they must be preserved all the time. Sometimes it’s like silly t

I will shout as hard as I can when I see cockroach, caterpillar, cat, mouse, grasshopper, rabbit,  and many other  animal whom I will see in my house. Automatically I don’t like haram animal like pig and dog. It also happen with animal that’s danger for human , like tiger, cheetah, lion, crocodile, etc, even some people also take after wild animal

I always make difficulties to  my mother about this fact, because I will shout everwhere when animal approach me or only exist in front of my sight.  Mama always mad because I only cry and don’t want to make them repeal from my surrounding, like throw stone. I never torture them or even kill them. I prefer ask someone to let animal go rather than hurt or kill the animal by myself. Gak tega deh sumpah.

It doesn’t mean I am vegetarian but it’s about  I don’t have the heart t to do it. Yes, I afraid to approach them but it doesn’t mean I don’t want to vanish them from my eyes.

I see my blogroll and I just perceive that almost 4 month,  September to December 2014, I never post anything to blogger.

September 2014 became my first month as freshman in Accounting – Universitas Brawijaya. I’m confused to explain detail why I cannot post anything.

As freshman, I began my activity by joining student orientation from level Universitas, Fakultas, and Jurusan. I got a lot of assignment. I got mad. I got exhausting. I got loss my time. I got no chance brainstorming to post anything to blogger. Hey I do exaggerate actually hehe because if I compare my student orientation as Accounting student than my friend in Engineer Faculty. I’m only a litte part of them.  I only have 1 day for  Universitas, 2 days for Fakultas + a month, and 2 days for Fakultas with a month to prepare the assignment. It’s different with engineer faculty that the bullying activity comes up everyday.

I also got additional class beside my real schedule in my usual class. It names ‘Excellent’, it’s like an English class special for Accounting freshman to make us be able to do conversation with English. Besides I also cannot enjoy my weekend because I must join tutorial class every Saturday.

Not stop until that point, I also have business to join my new organization, I take FORMASI to continue  my debate skill and I also join LSME, an organization about writing paper and another scientific creation.

But the most business time happened in October when I must do a lot of selection to be chosen as delegation Universitas Brawijaya in prestigious competition. I joined all selection and get it. I went home almost 11 p.m. everyday for a month. Hmm it really spend my time (explain it next) even I got prize when I joined the competition.

After I do contemplation…

I want to share what is my plan for this year: 2015. I want to make them will be more rational. I had traumatic when I made 15 things what I did on 2014 but those all were totally fail so I want to  make a new one and I hope to achieve those.

Is it rational to do? I believe to achieve them.

Wait my 100% success evaluation in the last day  of 2015

Cheers,

S.